Defining Beauty of a Woman

Beauty of a Woman.  What does this make you think of? How beautiful she is? If so, how would you then define beauty?

image via

beauty (ˈbjuːtɪ) 1. the combination of all the qualities of a person or thing that delight the senses and please the mind  2. a very attractive and well-formed girl or woman

In society today, I believe far too many get caught up in the second definition seen here, when in reality it is the first definition of beauty that we should direct our focus on. Achieve that, and the rest will follow.

Welcome to the Beauty of a Woman BlogFest. On Friday February 10th a list of the participates can be seen on August McLaughlin’s blog. Each blog will host a post celebrating the woman in the form of a story, poem, or article. There are great prizes to be won by visiting, commenting and tweeting the posts. So let’s have fun and skip along the beautiful blogs! 🙂

Hey guys! You’re not leaving so soon are you? You can get something out of this post as well. It pertains to both sexes.

What makes a woman beautiful? The multitude of fashion magazines, television shows and movies would have you believing it is the combination of bone structure, smooth skin, perfect hair and zero body fat. But even if you are lucky enough to have these perfect features, they are likely to fade with time.

image via Ignored

That is why we have seen so many women pushed and herded to other options in recent years. Influenced by others and all the media flaunted around them, they turn to a growing industry of buy-my-happiness plastic surgery. They shell out tons of dollars, wait out painful recovery times and take on new scars, all for what? To conform to what they feel is the accepted norm? Higher cheek bones, a larger cup size, or tighter butt checks do not make you a better person. And in the end, it won’t make your friends like you more or that man love you more. You must dig deep inside to find that special something that will make you stand out.

image via Wikimedia

Plus, all these physical attributes alone will not make for the beautiful woman.  I suggest that beauty is something that shines from deep within. It is your inner beauty. If you achieve inner beauty, it will glow for all to see, making you that much more beautiful on the outside.

How can this be, you ask? It’s an aura, a healthy radiance that shines bright from those comfortable in their own skin. It’s perceived by the mind’s eye of others (although they may not always realize it). This aura comes from within. Inner beauty makes it bright and beautiful. The healthier you are, mentally and physically, the brighter the glow.

How does one achieve inner beauty? The first step is to recognize your passions and then use them to create self-satisfaction in a positive nature.


Okay, let me make it a little clearer…

  1. Through doing what you love you show compassion towards others.
  2. You help others.
  3. You respect others and yourself.
  4. You’re giving and grateful.
  5. You are always there when someone needs a shoulder to cry on.
  6. You never forget to be thoughtful or considerate.
  7. You listen, smile, and are always kind and loving to others.
  8. You approach life and situations with an open-mind and tolerance.
  9.  You never pretend to be something you’re not, but are comfortable being  yourself with sincerity and without arrogance.
  10.  You always believe in yourself, no matter what. (It’s hard, I know. But do it!)
  11.  You always remember how to laugh. And more importantly, remember to laugh at yourself every now and again.
  12.  And most importantly, you are happy and delight in what you do.

What is the end lesson here? Our inner beauty is defined by our actions and words. Sometimes it is also defined by the things we chose not to say or do. For example, when we stay silent when a friend needs someone to stand up for them or when someone attempts to bridge a gap or make contact. To do nothing speaks against this list as well. Amazing is the woman who is always there for her friends or new souls seeking guidance. Beautiful and strong is the woman who stood up and fought for what she believed it, against all odds.

The woman providing friendship and comfort for her friends might not be putting herself on the line the same way someone as Alice Paul has (Secured the female vote). But both are important and you cannot compare the two since they were thrust into different circumstances with different driving factors motivating their lives and actions. Just the same, each is beautiful in her own right, and each serves and important purpose in the journey that is our life.  Where would you be today without your friend to lean on in your time of need?

If you haven’t already recognized your passion it’s time to go find your unique gift, develop and embrace it. Do it!  It will change your life. Not to mention make it richer and give it more meaning. I have a little experience in this area. When you find the love in what you’re doing you’ll find motivation. It will move you forward towards self-awareness so that you may grow spiritually and in the end, radiate to your outward self. I’m fairly certain of that.

Now guys, if there are any of you still left reading this post, I know I said the word woman a lot. But all those traits identified above that make a person beautiful; they will do the same thing for you too. Apply them to yourself and we women will adore you for it.

Remember, inner beauty trumps outer beauty any day.


 If you enjoyed this post or any of my previous posts, I’d be delighted to have you follow by email or RSS for any future posts. Likes, comments, and shares are also greatly appreciated.

About Debra Kristi

Debra Kristi is a mother, an author, a Pinterest addict, and sometimes DIY home decorator. Hang with her to escape the everyday stress. Be sure to leave your mind open to the fantastical.
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77 Responses to Defining Beauty of a Woman

  1. Great post Deborah. I agree whole-heartedly. It is a little heart breaking to see how much of today’s culture can undermine people’s perceptions of themselves, and to just what an extent it can do it too. Not many escape the effects of it either. In fact it may be worse now than it has ever been.

    Hope you have a great day :o)

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Yes, I agree. It’s a sad state. It affects the kids at such a young age and it’s so hard to turn their thinking around. Your post earlier this week (was it this week?) with all your amazing art reminded me how we need to celebrate what God gave us. This blogfest is so timely.

  2. Coleen Patrick says:

    Yay for the shining inner beauty aura!! 🙂

  3. Woot woot – it’s all about looking in the mirror and seeing the beauty of your inner self shining through….letting go of the pre-conceived notion of what makes a person beautiful and celebrating the AWEsomeness that within each of us!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Agreed. Sometimes that is the hardest thing to do, especially with all the media around us pushing another visual. Support of others that believe in the inner beauty is a wonderous thing. 🙂 You are BEAUTIFUL Natalie. ❤

  4. Very well said,

    I like your comment that when we recognize our passions and use them we display the traits of beauty in action and words.

    The most beautiful people that I know are compassionate and kind.

  5. Love this post! And I couldn’t agree more with all you said. My Beauty of a Woman contribution focuses on breast implants, to which I was so tempted at one time to get. Luckily I managed to find my inner strength and beauty, which as you stated, trumps all outward “imperfections” I may have seen at one time. Thank you for this!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      You’re welcome Ingrid. I have been there. I have considered several minor changes over the years. But I always heard my father’s voice in the back of my head, “Don’t mess with what God gave you.” And he said that when the first discussion came up over a minor ear tuck. I was upset that my grandmother had said I looked like a taxi going down the street with the doors open. Hello! Not nice grandma! I was a kid at the time. I’ve since gotten over it (mostly – LOL). I have friends that have gotten work done and I don’t hold anything against it. But I’m just saying it’s not necessary. And people shouldn’t feel pressured by others or society into such work to feel good about themselves. I’ve yammered enough. Can’t wait to read yours. .

  6. Remember, inner beauty trumps outer beauty any day. Wow, I couldn’t have said it any better. This is an awesome post. Let your light shine on girl. 🙂

  7. “Beautiful and strong is the woman who stood up and fought for what she believed it, against all odds.”
    Love this! It took me a long time to realize this, and I still struggle with it–a lot–but I really want to be the kind of beautiful you describe.

    • Debra Kristi says:

      I think we all struggle with that every day Marcy. I don’t believe it came easy for the individuals we read about. But it’s a constant choice we make over and over, every day and every moment of every day to be that person. I believe you can be that person because you want to be. I already see you as beautiful and strong. 🙂

  8. Kim Griffin says:

    LOVE this post. Every word true. It’s soooo easy to fall into the trap of perfect outer beauty. Sad. No one is immune to that trap – certainly not me.
    I watch the Real Housewives of blah blah blah and – although it’s good entertainment, I watch what they do to themselves to be pretty on the outside and it makes me feel for them. Inner work – that’s where it’s at.
    Great post!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Thank you Kim. I know I fall for it too. My husband is always yelling at me to hurry it up when I’m putting on my face. LOL Who do I want to look go for? Myself, mostly. I know he cares for me just as I am. But my kid will be the first one to tell me if I look less than stellar. LOL

  9. When I was 23 I thought about getting breast implants (I was a perfect 34C, what the hell was I thinking? I lived in Los Angeles, ‘nuf said), but I went to England instead and got my daughter. I think I made the right choice. And hey! Now I’m a lot larger breast wise (butt wise, too).

    Shine on, my friend!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Thank you my friend. I have considered may things. Going the opposite way of implants for one. And I was a perfect 34B before kids. Funny how kids change all that, isn’t it? Not funny – ha ha. You totally possess that inner beauty. I see it in the way you treat and promote everyone around you Ms. Tameri. 🙂

  10. Shannon Esposito says:

    Yes! I think we know this as truth, now we just have to actually “believe” it for ourselves 🙂

  11. I love watching the actresses who avoid physical enhancements in favor of aging naturally. They are wonderful inspirations for today’s youth … in fact, for us all.

    Wonderful post, Debra. Thanks for sharing. 🙂

  12. I totally agree. This goes along with my post What Girls Want and Do you makeup. 🙂

  13. susielindau says:

    So true. Our inner confidence is what brings a smile to our faces which can then be reflected in others….=true beauty.
    Great post!

  14. Fabio Bueno says:

    It is very fitting that a post about beauty is so beautiful. Loved your inner beauty list, Debra!

  15. Kara says:

    I agree totally – Inner beauty trumps outer beauty! I love all the points you made about how we tend to view beauty!

  16. I’m imagining you giving it as a presentation for YAs… 🙂 Yet, the pertains to all ages and genders. Defined by our action and words—love that! And your list of suggestions is invaluable. Beautiful post a true beauty. Thanks so much, Debra!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Well, at this point my focus is a YA crowd – for my book! LOL I hope it didn’t come off as preachy. :-/ Thank you for your kind words. I’m glad you liked the suggestions.

  17. Wonderful post, Debra!
    I love the “Inner beauty trumps outer beauty any day” – so true!

  18. Hi Debra! So great to see you are participating in the Beauty of a Woman Blogfest, too… (such a grand assortment of bloggers, aren’t we… LOL…. We all pull off the Beautiful Card with such grace and finesse….).

    I love this, especially >>> Always BELIEVE in yourself.

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Hi Julie! Great to see you here! We really did, didn’t we? August pulled together an amazing blogfest! She is a fabulous example of grace and finesse herself. I guess it’s no surprise she organized us all into the same manner. LOL

      Thank you so much Julie! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post.

  19. Emma says:

    I feel much better after watching the evolution video. We obviously can’t believe anything we’re seeing in magazines. Phew 🙂 Nice post Debra.

  20. CC MacKenzie says:

    I LOVE this, Debra.

    As the mother of daughters, I’ve seen how much damage skewed thinking can do to young girls. Neither of mine have ever had body issues, mainly because they keep fit and don’t eat rubbish. However, they did have girls in school who became very ill with bulemia and anorexia. In the UK cosmetic surgery has become prevalent among the 16-25 yr olds and it’s scary. Boob, nose, teeth, there always seems to be the next fad.

    I totally blame the media, magazines and the fashion industry who should hand their head in shame. I don’t buy magazines with anorexic models in them, neither do my girls or their friends. But it’s up to us, the adults, to educate our girls and boys in the home and in schools about the reality of what they see and how it’s produced. That clip should be shown to children as young as six, because they will totally get how they’re being manipulated and stop worrying about being ‘perfect’.

    It doesn’t take young adults long to realise that it’s what’s inside a person, how they think, how they behave, their values and beliefs that make them tick that matters more than the way they’re gift wrapped.

    I’ll jump off the soapbox now!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      🙂 Yes, as mothers of young girls we need to be very careful what they perceive and pick up from the media around them. It’s a tricky path we must travel. But our girls are worth it. Likewise, we want to instill the right ideals in our boys and make sure they are looking at the whole package and not just the wrappings.

  21. You are correct that it’s inner beauty that really matters. But no matter how important that is, I believe life is easier for those who have the outward beauty, too. It’s just a sad fact of life because too many people can’t get past the less than perfect packaging to discover what’s inside. And it’s even sadder to see young girls buy into the beauty is everything garbage. It just doesn’t matter. I’d rather be a nice person any day of the week. LOL…be nice to knock people’s socks off once in awhile though. 🙂

    • Debra Kristi says:

      I hear you Kristy. But being a knock out comes with a whole other set of problems you may not think of. There’s the pressure to maintain for one. August’s post “Does Dirt have Calories” is a good example. You couldn’t eat all those things you love so much. Anyway, there is always an argument for either side. A healthy balance would be nice. I think you are beautiful Kristy. Don’t you forget it!

  22. What a beautiful post, Debra! You captured the essence of a real, ever-lasting beauty.

  23. beautiful post Debra. it’s always about the person inside, not the packaging she is wrapped in. Seems the media forgets that all the time.

  24. You are so right, Debra. One day, if we’re all very lucky, society will wake up and smell the coffee on this one. I do think we’re moving in the right direction, even though the pace is glacial.

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  27. Fabulous post, Debra! I’m going to forward it to my teenage granddaughters AND I am SO going to copy the poster you have here (will see if I can order copies for the girsl)! Thank you.

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Wow! Thank you Patricia! That’s really cool of you. Isn’t that a great poster? Ideal for the girls to have by their desk or on the inside of their school folder. I hope they like it. Thank you so much for stopping in.

  28. Patricia says:

    Wonderful post, Debra! I wish more people looked for the inner beauty not just in themselves, but in others.

    You are a beautiful person. Thanks for sharing in the expressions of womens’ beauty at today’s blogfest. Such terrific things to remember!

    Patricia Rickrode
    w/a Jansen Schmidt

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Thank you so much! I am so touched that you would say that about me. You see, I’m one of those that have trouble accepting the compliment. I’ll do my best this time. 😉

      I normally call you Jansen, but when you post like this I’m not sure if I should call you Patricia instead. :-/ LOL

  29. gingercalem says:

    Fantastic post, Debra. I loved this part: The healthier you are, mentally and physically, the brighter the glow. (couldn’t agree more)

    And this really speaks to me: When you find the love in what you’re doing you’ll find motivation.

    Just wonderful. Thank you for your beautiful words.

  30. Lynn Kelley says:

    I love this post, Debra, and your list. Awesome. And I love how you point out to the men that the list applies to them, too! And the pics are great, too. Well done, beautiful lady!

  31. I couldn’t comment when I first read this through my phone, and had to come back and re-read. Your list is dead-on! This, though, is my favorite: “If you haven’t already recognized your passion it’s time to go find your unique gift, develop and embrace it. Do it! It will change your life. ” I can see in your writing, in your blog posts, that you have found yours and it makes you one of the shiny ones. Beautiful post, beautiful woman!

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Aw, thank you so much Serena. What I love most is writing my book! So maybe I should get to that, huh? Thank you so much for your kind words. You post was so appropriate as well.

  32. Finding your passion does change one’s life and it goes a long way toward making that aura glow. Wonderful post. Look at you glow!

  33. The most beautiful women in my life all love themselves.

    • Debra Kristi says:

      The most important ingredient Anthony! Wonderful to see you! I hope this finds you loving yourself as well, and letting your inner light shine. Like I said, this applies to men as well. 🙂

  34. Loved this blog and all the reminders of important behaviors to practice.

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  37. Definitely, what a splendid website and educative posts, I surely will bookmark your website.Have an awsome day!

  38. belinda dominguez says:

    Like! awesome words very true.:))

    • Debra Kristi says:

      Thank you so much, Belinda! I really appreciate you stopping by! Sorry I was away at a conference when you left your note and wasn’t able to respond sooner. 🙂

  39. Eric I says:

    Great blog! I had a question, I like the first picture of the woman that you have towards the top of the article, I was curious if my band and me could use it as one of our background photos. Please email us at
    Thank you!

  40. Manou says:

    i’m an algerian girl and i adore this post just perfect

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